CHAPTER 12, PAGE 20

 

If I were ol' Santa

Author unknown

If I were ol' Santa, you know what I'd do;

I'd dump silly gifts that are given to you,

and deliver some things just inside your front door,

things you have lost, but treasured before.

I'd give you back all your maidenly vigor,

and to go along with it, a neat tiny figure.

Then restore the old color that once graced your hair,

before rinses and bleaches took residence there.

I'd bring back the shape with which you were gifted,

so things now suspended need not be uplifted.

I'd draw in your tummy and smooth down your back

until you'd be a dream in those tight fitting slacks.

I'd remove all your wrinkles and leave only one chin,

so you wouldn't spend hours rubbing grease on your skin.

You'd never have flashes or queer dizzy spells

and you wouldn't hear noises like ringing of bells.

No sore aching feet and no corns on your toes;

no searching for spectacles when they're right on your nose.

Not a shot would you take in your arm, hip or fanny

from a doctor who thinks you're a nervous old granny.

You'd never have a headache, so no pills would you take

 and no heating pad needed since your muscles won't ache.

Yes, if I were Santa, you'd never look stupid.

You'd be a cute little chick with the romance of cupid.

I'd give a lift to your heart when those wolves start to whistle

 and the joys of your heart would be light as a thistle.

But alas! I'm not Santa. I'm simply just me;

the matronliest of matrons you ever did see.

I wish I could tell you all the symptoms I've got,

but I'm due at my doctor's for an estrogen shot.

Even though we've grown older this wish is sincere;

Merry Christmas to you and a Happy New Year.

 

GOOD MORNING!

If you are like me a little humor is needed today! So the above hopefully added a ***BIG SMILE*** to your face this morning !

The count down is on …5 days and Christmas will be here. In my case it’s 2 days and our Family Christmas will be here. I’m mostly ready except for preparing some food,but I can’t do that until Friday evening or Saturday morning.

Meanwhile I’m brought back down to earth by work…It doesn’t go away til 5:00 tomorrow.l

I owe , I owe So it’s off to work I go

THOUGHT FOR TODAY

Our life is a gift from God and what we do with our life is our gift to God.

Eleanor Powell

We all like to give and receive gifts. They tell us though that millions is spent on unwanted gifts at Christmas time. God gives us many gifts each day, but especially the gift of life. Our life enables us to use all that God has given to us. It is up to us to use them well. It would be a shame to let them become unused and unwanted gifts.

Thought For Today by Fr.James McSweeney

May the season's simple joys

Warm your heart...

Fill your home...

Last a lifetime

 

MA

 

 

 

graphics by: www.untilthengraphics.com

 

aoljpictureUpload, aoljpictureUpload_7